Pause

Sometimes something happens that stops you in your tracks. Pulls you up short. Makes you look around.

Yesterday I was just getting ready to pick up Elder from summer camp, thinking what to make for tea, worrying about today’s meetings. Then I got one of ‘those’ calls. A member of my family is very ill, probably not getting better ill. I can’t say more because they aren’t party to this blog and have a right to privacy. But oh, it knocks the wind out of you. I’ve been here before, twice. I hate this particular waiting room. I know it’s peeling posters and cracked walls.

Looking back over the last few blog entries I may seem to be a bit (a bit?!) frivolous but I’m trying to live in the moment. Parkinsons brought me up short, as did my previous visits to the waiting room. Yesterday’s news reconfirms this – we have to grab what life we have and squeeze it dry. In the meantime could someone please have a word with Management to at least change the magazines in here?

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6 Comments Add yours

  1. So sorry to hear your bad news.
    I’ve been there, too. Having a life-threatening illness certainly brings you up short, almost in a good way. Life never seems so vibrant and exhilarating as when you’re faced with loss or change.
    You’re so right to squeeze every bit out of life. I’m annoyed with myself that I’ve already forgotten to do just that, until I read your post. Why, so soon after being in the ‘waiting room’, do we forget? Minutes after thinking ‘I’ll never take life for granted again’ we seem to be back whittling about petty, mundane things.
    Thank you for reminding me, and wishing you all the best.

    1. quarkee says:

      I was worried it was a bit ‘me, me, me’ but I can’t do anything to help out and so thoughts turn inwards. Glad you’re ok now High, go out there and squeeze away!!

  2. dillytante says:

    Very eloquent post. Sorry you are faced with this. I think your sentiments are very worthy but I wouldn’t beat yourself up about ‘sweating the small stuff’. I read a good book recently called ‘Smile or Die’ about the myths behind positive thinking. One of it’s points was that people who have suffered from illnesses such as cancer are expected to take this benevolent grateful for life attitude and not to get hacked off because their train is late or Tesco’s didn’t deliver their wine. Well, I think that is all the more reason to be hacked off. No wine and a serious illness? Sod not sweating the small stuff, the world owes you a break!

    1. quarkee says:

      John Diamond said the same in ‘C’ -you’re almost considered a failure if you DON’T smile your way through. Hooray for a bit of realistic anger I say. It’s a great motivator. Thanks Dilly.

  3. Good point, Dillytante. Yes, who needs ANOTHER thing to feel guilty about! Don’t want to add slippage of positivity to an ever-lengthening list.

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