Ciao!

To Venice…yes, you heard right. I’m in this lovely city for two nights. I booked a cheaply flight ages ago and was coming out to go to the Bienniale but instead I have spent my time at the Peggy Guggenheim Collection. Why Peggy? Well, I haven’t written about it yet but I was a contestant on a British TV show called Mastermind recently. Now this is a BIG THING for me…I have watched MM since I can remember and have harvoured a fantasy of being a contestant for years. Reader, I did it.

I applied a couple of years ago and to cut a long story short, was accepted out of loads of entries and filmed my episode over the Summer. You can find a link to it (episode 13) here. My specialist subject was the wonderful Ms Guggenheim so I felt duty bound to go and pay my respects.

What a wonderful place. I stayed almost all day. Really, you have to go if you get the chance. My phone is charging at the moment so I can’t post the photos but I will return. Just wanted to get this down while I can. See, I’m trying to be sensible!

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Treacle

I am in treacle and that’s not a good thing. I am trying to stride through life, I am trying to maintain momentum. But I realise I have to, and I mean HAVE to, pare it down, strip it out and get back to my core. Back to the most important things in my life….family and art. That’s it. So although I have done a LOT of decluttering and reorganising recently I still have a way to go and I have to re-examine what I spend my time on.

I am also taking part in a pilot online self management programme for Parkinsons’ uk which I will update you guys on as soon as possible. It’s great though and has shown me how rich and varied my life and experiences can continue to be. New spins on old thoughts and shared experiences are challenging my assumptions.

Put these two shake ups in my life at the same time and you have a chaotic mix, throwing me around but, hopefully, leaving me at rest in a better place. I’m still slewing aroundbut am trying to get my new bearings and they are falling into place.

Life is so valuable and rare, I want to grab it even harder but the skill I have to learn is how to embrace it without taking in too much. And how to remember to take my meds. Important one, that.

People soup

Porridge tastes better in the dawn

As water drips off my wetsuit 

a chorus of chatter, of laughs and faint screams 

and make mine a chocolate and don’t hold the cream.

the sun slowly lighting us up as it lifts 

and time is so precious 

So relish the gift 

and soon we’ll return to real life – The rat race 

But this is my bubble

A bright shiny place. 

 

Now

I have a confession to make, I have another love in my life. I have been working on another venture and this weekend it took flight. I am now the founder of an arts space here in Stitchopolis. Can you believe it??  Check it out here

Hope you like!

Peck

I was once told that there are two

Types of folk in this world

The ones who leave you safe and warm

And those who leave you cold.

Not cold as in, you just don’t care

No, I mean chilled and hurt

All life leached out because they drain

Your joy by their salt words. 

I see my friend affected thus

Pecked by a ravens beak

Picked up upon with gimlet eye

And gossips thrill to speak.

I find it hard to see this as

I felt the same attack 

But if I may quote that Mr Poe

“nevermore” is now my track…

So no to social bullying 

to those who strike a spark

and no to those who fan the flame

And burn to leave a mark. 

For life is truely much too short

To be upset or cranky

Ignore Those revellers in discord. 

 it’s them not you who’s manky . 

 

Supernova

The timeline is complicated

But unforgivingly straight 

Before the night We shine

We burn

I’m bright, I know

I have letters to prove

To me, at least.

But Perhaps this fire this inner flash

This drive these files this splash

Are my last gasp

My battle cry

Before I start to fade.

I’ll rage against the downwards force

Oppose it with my will

I’ll go down fighting

But I know

I’m going downwards still.

I see it clearly now and then 

I catch a glimpse of truth

And I ignore it

And push on

There’s f2%k all else to do.

Berlin face off 

I was standing on the pavement

My fingers cold and stiff 

The phone loose in my hand 

It’s job done

Directions good.

I saw my goal

Iconic and cool

Lines clean against the cobalt rise

And then a blue

Familiar friend

Caught my eye and

As I bent

Towards its light

 I saw my life

The first one – past –

Just sitting there

Edging in my view

Not framing

Not quiet

But glowering, dark

No face just squares

And that same blue

That I wore close

And thought would stay

Now shadowed by the new design

The squares no longer box me in

I turned and walked

Away.

Rocking

I crashed and burned today, 

my body just refusing 

To move the way I wished it to,

I stopped and pain ripped through.

My friend appeared and so I asked

For help.

She did, of course.

And so I glided home

A passenger

 all tucked in tight

But weary to the bone.

My partner saved me at the gate

And placed me on a throne

Of rocking chair and threadbare stool

And gave me water cool.

I cried, I have to admit now.

I cried, the tears were hot.

Because I have so much to do 

But I had quite forgot,

That moderation is the key,

I have to pace myself.

Because a swoop begats a dive

And I can’t face myself.

And yet I’m here at almost 12.

I’m sitting up alone.

Because despite my limits clear

I still must make you hear…

Make you understand – 

 this Disease does not define me

Confine, oh yes, it does that well

But best me? 

Not a hope in hell.

t=0

how many really significant days do you have in a lifetime I wonder? days that change your life forever. I started writing this post awhile ago but life as ever gets in the way. And I have had lots of time to think about my first question. I don’t think there are that many of those days the problem is we don’t know when they’re coming. I have had a few in quick succession having said that. And I hope to be able to share them with you shortly. Suffice to say, I am working on something that will change my life in a good way. And I really can’t wait to share.